P.S.--part two

Will explain about what I meant by still having some eating disorder issues when I was married....

First, I'd been socially isolated--by my choice--when I was ill....  That was something that happened with some eating disorder patients.  I was very ashamed of gaining weight [after I gained weight]....  It sounds silly, or even crazy, but that was a thing for me....  [I later had some OTHER issues in addition to my weight issues, which made me want to be isolated....  I couldn't control my thoughts and I felt that I sometimes embarrassed myself around other people....  The problem was the way I'd reacted--or not reacted sufficiently enough--to the restrictions the residential school had placed on me concerning my relationship with my husband-to-be....  (It's simple enough for observers to say:  No courting was allowed for beginning students...but in practise it was more complicated, because of the living arrangements at the school....  Do I need to write more about this?  Have written a lot already....)  I also felt guilty after some of the bigger binges....]  ***  I had gotten eating disorder treatment in Toronto, and then moved there....  I was enjoying the people and the city, but lived in a small, northern town with my husband....  After I left my husband, I lived in northern Ontario for a while--not in the smallest towns--and then moved to the south....  And then my landlord case came up....  [If I don't get around enough now, it's only from a lack of money....  I don't mind being around people and am happy for it, except I have to be somewhat cautious because many people know my background and they can be nervous....]

Second, there were some relationships to restore with people who teased me about weight when I was young....  One of them was mad at me for a different reason, which she didn't discuss with me...but I found out later....  Have repaired this relationship since.  [Another person was a teenage boy--underage--and he's not in my life now....  He's married....  No need to stir things up with him....  (Except he supports the police....  Whatever.)]

Third, my wardrobe needed some help...and it should've been done before I got married, according to wedding etiquette or whatever....  Economic issues were the thing....  [Eating disorder patients may have trouble with gaining and losing weight, and their clothes can be an issue....]

Fourth, I continued some therapy in the nearest big city when I was married but it cost money to go there...have continued some therapy or self-help when I've had an opportunity since then....  One was a Christian group with a workbook....  I got cut off due to factors beyond my control but learned something practical....  Then I read a great book by an American lady who had suffered, and who did a lot of research on eating disorders....  Great help!  Issues about food and weight and how I thought of them....  (For example, "magical thinking" that thinness will save my life!  I got teased a lot--mercilessly--and it affected me consciously and unconsciously....)  Some girls wanted to have a little-girl, or almost a little-boy image of themselves....  Didn't want to grow up and have an adult image--therefore remaining very small and thin....  I was embarrassed of my anger problem towards my mom earlier...but I got over the anger and the problem....  Generally, I was happy to be a woman, and my husband-to-be had made me feel more feminine.  I needed to have adult emotions and be mature....  I'd say I'm reasonably comfortable with myself now....  The police project is a challenge, as far as dealing with the pressure on me....  (The self-help books say to accept the challenge and find your purpose and fulfillment...!--I'm working on it.)

Last, but not least, some researchers say abuse is involved in most eating disorders...and I hadn't had any counselling on abuse before I got married....  Got some later....  In my opinion, it's good for everyone to know how to deal with abuse and bullying....  It happens to a lot of people, at different times....  (My husband had some abusive tendencies sometimes....) 

Is this going to be enough explaining...?  I suppose some of the gay police and their gay supporters might be looking for anything they suspect might be connected to gay issues...?